My name is Ali. Things I dislike include wearing socks in the summer, pants, poor table manners, and most girls Things I like include v-necks, body modification, boobs, and cats. Also I'm fucking hilarious. If you want to know anything else message me. I'm cool people. Online Users

 

wintry-mix:

success-is-my-goal:

ronnieisnotamazing:

SO HE WAS HOT THE WHOLE TIME AND WE JUST DIDN’T KNOW IT.

WHAT

Citizens of the world, we have been deceived.

(Source: i-am-a-snitch)

hisgirlanna:

syberwuff:

flawless-babe:

luusting:

anarchistantichristasshole:

FOREVER REBLOG

I HAVE TO REBLOG THIS HOMYGOD. LMFAO.

lmao i love this soo much

I have to reblog this again. I love it so much.

(Source: truly--deeply)

heros-of-the-bluebox:

sluttyoliveoil:

cough

rough

though

through

why dont these words rhyme

but for some god forsaken reason pony and bologna do

guy:

yeah baby i am an ANIMAL in bed. more specifically a koala. i can sleep for 22 hours a day

(Source: guy)

Ooh someone left a tip!…just kidding it’s only a church thing telling me about how I’m “a lying, thieving, blasphemous adulterer at heart” who will end up in hell 💁happy easter💋🐰😈

Ooh someone left a tip!…just kidding it’s only a church thing telling me about how I’m “a lying, thieving, blasphemous adulterer at heart” who will end up in hell 💁happy easter💋🐰😈

whatifscientistcarlos:

staticoptics:

Allow me to explain the anatomy of a cat’s paw.

image

Smush beans!!! Piddle paws. Liddle piddles. Smoosh bean piddly doos.

Fluffstuff pink piddle chubber bubbies.

As a biologist I can attest for the accuracy of this. 

giraffepoliceforce:

Unsure of how to confess your love to someone? Try this:

  1. Acquire several dozen limes.
  2. Go up to them and then drop all the limes.
  3. Start picking them up, but keep dropping them. The clumsier you look the better.
  4. Keep doing this until you have their attention (this could take up to thirty minutes).
  5. Finally gather up the limes. Try looking a bit sheepish.
  6. Look them deeply in the eyes and say, “Sorry. I’m bad at Pickup Limes.”
  7. Marry them.